Not a substantial post today, just a link to something very much worth reading.
Jonathan Chait for The New Republic on John McCain and his lying ways.
I have a lot to say about what is going on right now, but not too much time to say it. Maybe Friday, as tomorrow is off-limits due to the season premier of the Office.
Happy reading!
24 September 2008
20 September 2008
microsoft ads
Before I proceed:
:: BIAS DISCLAIMER ::
I have made clear my support of Apple before, but I do not write the following article from any perspective other than that of an amused observer of a foundering (and wildly expensive) ad campaign.
End disclaimer.
----------------------------
I was watching the last rerun of the Office Thursday night when I was treated to a true commercial masterpiece: the new Microsoft ads, herein referred to as the "I'm a PC" ads. They are so called because they feature an array of famous people proclaiming their status as PCs - presumably meaning that they are PC users and not horrifyingly realistic cyborgs created my Microsoft to brainwash us all... but I digress. The main thrust of this ad, from what I can tell, is to rebut the claim made by Apple in its "PC versus Mac" commercials that PCs aren't hip and cool, a claim made byt he juxtaposition between the cool (condescending?) Mac Guy (a reference to Apple founder and CEO Steve Jobs) and the hapless, nerdy PC Guy (an obvious and apparently irksome reference to Microsoft founder Bill Gates).
This "I'm a PC" ad is just the latest in a series of ads trying to rebrand Microsoft as just as awesome as Apple... the only problem being that the entire campaign has been waged in a very Microsoft (and hence uncool and plodding) way. This $300 MILLION effort has fallen largely flat so far, and has been supremely entertaining to watch as a Mac fan, mainly because it has only served to reaffim my distaste for the Redmond crowd.
Set #1: The Mojave Experiment. These ads show the results of a "field test" that Microsoft ran with 140 participants in the aim of disproving the bad rap that Vista has had since its release two years ago. The premise is that these users were told they were running a new operating system called "Mojave" when in fact they were running a Vista on max-ed out systems (high end graphics cards, loads of RAM, etc). The result? These users LOVED the system (satisfaction rating of 8.5 versus a control rating of 4.4) and were SHOCKED when they were told they had been running Vista all along. The point? Apparently the only reason customers have been dissatisfied with Vista is THEIR OWN IGNORANCE!!!111 Microsoft would like customers to believe that their product isn't shitty and cumbersome to most of the computers that run it, but rather that the average user is gullible and has too readily bought into the CW about Vista (that it is shitty and cumbersome). WHAT A RELIEF! Sounds almost like Phill Gramm (perhaps the leading candidate for Donkey of the Decade) was behind these stinkers. Oh, and for those of you who forgot, he is the McCain advisor that earlier this summer said that this country was full of whiners and that the only recession we are going through is a "mental" one. Remind yourself of that when you are checking into your 401k, if it still exists.
Set #2: The Ads About Nothing. These ads, featuring Bill Gates and comic genius Jerry Seinfeld, were aimed at touting... no, demonstrating the capabil... no, hell I don't know what they were trying to show and I don't think most viewers could figure that out either. The two that have run so far (there is supposedly a third one out there, but it is not planned to hit airwaves) have featured Gates and Seinfeld in "real people" locations doing "real people" things. I guess the idea behind these ads was to demonstrate that, despite his billions, Gates still likes to save on shoes? These ads were truly Seinfeldian in the sense that they were about nothing, and really didn't try to sell the viewer anything. In that respect I think they were a success. Unfortunately for Microsoft, that was the only realm in which they succeeded. If I was anything like the average viewer, I got two things out of the ad: 1) a fresh look at some Seinfeld humor and 2) the chance to laugh at an aimless ad campaign from M$. Thanks, Billy boy, for keeping my homeboy Jerry rich (he was paid $10 mil for the spots) and me laughing at your company!
Set #3: The Aforementioned "I'm A PC" Ads. On the face of it, these ads may seem like they are doing the job they were intended to do (unlike the Seinfeld ones) and giving the viewer some credit (unlike the insulting Mojave ones). The problem with these ads, though? As Prince McLean puts it in his recent article:
I loled at you, Microsoft. Just stick with what you know and don't try to "be cool". Most people use you for uncool things at work and school, and thats ok. Just take your ~90% market share and be happy! You have your monopoly and most people would be content with that. So sit back, relax, and leave the commercials to the fine folks in Cupertino.
PS - Interestingly enough, the "I'm a PC" ads were apparently made on, you guessed it, a Mac!
:: BIAS DISCLAIMER ::
I have made clear my support of Apple before, but I do not write the following article from any perspective other than that of an amused observer of a foundering (and wildly expensive) ad campaign.
End disclaimer.
----------------------------
I was watching the last rerun of the Office Thursday night when I was treated to a true commercial masterpiece: the new Microsoft ads, herein referred to as the "I'm a PC" ads. They are so called because they feature an array of famous people proclaiming their status as PCs - presumably meaning that they are PC users and not horrifyingly realistic cyborgs created my Microsoft to brainwash us all... but I digress. The main thrust of this ad, from what I can tell, is to rebut the claim made by Apple in its "PC versus Mac" commercials that PCs aren't hip and cool, a claim made byt he juxtaposition between the cool (condescending?) Mac Guy (a reference to Apple founder and CEO Steve Jobs) and the hapless, nerdy PC Guy (an obvious and apparently irksome reference to Microsoft founder Bill Gates).
This "I'm a PC" ad is just the latest in a series of ads trying to rebrand Microsoft as just as awesome as Apple... the only problem being that the entire campaign has been waged in a very Microsoft (and hence uncool and plodding) way. This $300 MILLION effort has fallen largely flat so far, and has been supremely entertaining to watch as a Mac fan, mainly because it has only served to reaffim my distaste for the Redmond crowd.
Set #1: The Mojave Experiment. These ads show the results of a "field test" that Microsoft ran with 140 participants in the aim of disproving the bad rap that Vista has had since its release two years ago. The premise is that these users were told they were running a new operating system called "Mojave" when in fact they were running a Vista on max-ed out systems (high end graphics cards, loads of RAM, etc). The result? These users LOVED the system (satisfaction rating of 8.5 versus a control rating of 4.4) and were SHOCKED when they were told they had been running Vista all along. The point? Apparently the only reason customers have been dissatisfied with Vista is THEIR OWN IGNORANCE!!!111 Microsoft would like customers to believe that their product isn't shitty and cumbersome to most of the computers that run it, but rather that the average user is gullible and has too readily bought into the CW about Vista (that it is shitty and cumbersome). WHAT A RELIEF! Sounds almost like Phill Gramm (perhaps the leading candidate for Donkey of the Decade) was behind these stinkers. Oh, and for those of you who forgot, he is the McCain advisor that earlier this summer said that this country was full of whiners and that the only recession we are going through is a "mental" one. Remind yourself of that when you are checking into your 401k, if it still exists.
Set #2: The Ads About Nothing. These ads, featuring Bill Gates and comic genius Jerry Seinfeld, were aimed at touting... no, demonstrating the capabil... no, hell I don't know what they were trying to show and I don't think most viewers could figure that out either. The two that have run so far (there is supposedly a third one out there, but it is not planned to hit airwaves) have featured Gates and Seinfeld in "real people" locations doing "real people" things. I guess the idea behind these ads was to demonstrate that, despite his billions, Gates still likes to save on shoes? These ads were truly Seinfeldian in the sense that they were about nothing, and really didn't try to sell the viewer anything. In that respect I think they were a success. Unfortunately for Microsoft, that was the only realm in which they succeeded. If I was anything like the average viewer, I got two things out of the ad: 1) a fresh look at some Seinfeld humor and 2) the chance to laugh at an aimless ad campaign from M$. Thanks, Billy boy, for keeping my homeboy Jerry rich (he was paid $10 mil for the spots) and me laughing at your company!
Set #3: The Aforementioned "I'm A PC" Ads. On the face of it, these ads may seem like they are doing the job they were intended to do (unlike the Seinfeld ones) and giving the viewer some credit (unlike the insulting Mojave ones). The problem with these ads, though? As Prince McLean puts it in his recent article:
"Apple presents the Mac in contrast to PC because it wants to avoid any unnecessary mention of Windows. By copying Apple's line, Microsoft will be spending millions to advertise the PC rather than the Windows brand.
Further, as PC companies such as Dell and Acer continue to seek new ways to use Linux in place of Windows, and as the top PC vendor HP begins its own efforts to create a Windows alternative ... the idea of advertising 'the PC' [does] even less for Microsoft."
I loled at you, Microsoft. Just stick with what you know and don't try to "be cool". Most people use you for uncool things at work and school, and thats ok. Just take your ~90% market share and be happy! You have your monopoly and most people would be content with that. So sit back, relax, and leave the commercials to the fine folks in Cupertino.
PS - Interestingly enough, the "I'm a PC" ads were apparently made on, you guessed it, a Mac!
18 September 2008
predictive powers
As it turns out, having NO internet access at home will do a lot to hinder one's ability to update a blog. That being said, I think I have worked out a system (read: found a place secret nearby with free interwebs) that will allow me to update pretty much every day. Its not that I haven't had ideas for blogging, its just that I haven't had the chance to get to internet to share them.
But a few updates before I get to the main point of this post:
1) I now have TV. Phase 1 of my master Satellite TV plan is complete.
2) I have begun to listen to the "Southern Light Gospel Network" radio station. Not because I have turned a new leaf, but because I am a cynical bastard and like to hear what these "values voters" have to say sometimes.
3) I have rediscovered the glory of the Lean Mean Fat Burning Machine (otherwise known as a George Foreman Grill)
And now back to your regularly scheduled programming:
I would like to point out to everyone my amazing predictive powers. Last week, there was a lot of hand-wringing and chicken-little-ing coming from a lot of Obama supporters. If you can remember that far back (before this nation's economy took a long walk off a short, poorly constructed pier) all signs pointed to the "genius" of the Palin pick and how soaring McCain's numbers were due to his "maverick" seclection of the Alaskan governor. I was beginning to get a little hot under the collar myself, but then took a step back and remembered what I had thought the instant I heard that Palin was goingto be McCain's running mate: holy shit, what a pick, she must be the least qualified veep selection since Spiro Agnew... this is gold! I then wrote the following passage in an email to a friend the morning of Wednesday 10 September:
"I am sure you are well aware of the seemingly boundless "Palin bounce" that is going on right now, with McCain experiencing boosts in all the major polls and especially among the white middle age women bracket. From what I have read on most of the sites these days (this is what I do when kids fall asleep in class instead of responding to my summons), it seems like the netroots are getting hot under the collar regarding this situation. I really don't think they should (at least thats what I tell myself when I begin to worry), for a few reasons. First, I know the media is definitely doing its part (ie: lipstick on a pig flap) to fan the flames being ignighted by the McCain campaign. It seems that they are all too happy to harp on any little thing that comes there way that feeds into the McCain-Palin bounce narrative that seems to be the order of the week for the news cycle. Secondly, the Obama campaign (while being far from perfect) has done a good job so far in weathering all storms that have come its way (remember that time Obama was linked to a certain radical pastor? who talks about that anymore?) and come out of everything pretty much on top. I am sure that the next week's narrative will have something to do with the outright dishonest and dishonorable nature of a lot of the ads that the McCain campaign is running (that sex-ed one comes to mind) and the flaws in the Palin selection (which after some initial doubts has been hailed as a great success from what I have read)."
There you have it, ladies and gents, the media is so predictable that this lowly college advisor could figure out what would play out in the coming week: a shift in narrative, new portents of an Obama surge, and Palin coming under even more scrutiny.
As for another prediction, I don't think I want to press my luck... BUT I do like to gamble, so I am going to go out on a limb:
Prediction: Next week will be another rough one for McCain, as his "fundamentals" comment gets more and more play, and possibly his bizarre interview coupled with Chuck Hagel's comments about Palin will play well into the developing narrative that McCain's numbers are following the Dow's southward plunge. Look for this to feed nicely into the story that McCain will "do better than expected" in next Friday's debate.
Lets watch how this works.
But a few updates before I get to the main point of this post:
1) I now have TV. Phase 1 of my master Satellite TV plan is complete.
2) I have begun to listen to the "Southern Light Gospel Network" radio station. Not because I have turned a new leaf, but because I am a cynical bastard and like to hear what these "values voters" have to say sometimes.
3) I have rediscovered the glory of the Lean Mean Fat Burning Machine (otherwise known as a George Foreman Grill)
And now back to your regularly scheduled programming:
I would like to point out to everyone my amazing predictive powers. Last week, there was a lot of hand-wringing and chicken-little-ing coming from a lot of Obama supporters. If you can remember that far back (before this nation's economy took a long walk off a short, poorly constructed pier) all signs pointed to the "genius" of the Palin pick and how soaring McCain's numbers were due to his "maverick" seclection of the Alaskan governor. I was beginning to get a little hot under the collar myself, but then took a step back and remembered what I had thought the instant I heard that Palin was goingto be McCain's running mate: holy shit, what a pick, she must be the least qualified veep selection since Spiro Agnew... this is gold! I then wrote the following passage in an email to a friend the morning of Wednesday 10 September:
"I am sure you are well aware of the seemingly boundless "Palin bounce" that is going on right now, with McCain experiencing boosts in all the major polls and especially among the white middle age women bracket. From what I have read on most of the sites these days (this is what I do when kids fall asleep in class instead of responding to my summons), it seems like the netroots are getting hot under the collar regarding this situation. I really don't think they should (at least thats what I tell myself when I begin to worry), for a few reasons. First, I know the media is definitely doing its part (ie: lipstick on a pig flap) to fan the flames being ignighted by the McCain campaign. It seems that they are all too happy to harp on any little thing that comes there way that feeds into the McCain-Palin bounce narrative that seems to be the order of the week for the news cycle. Secondly, the Obama campaign (while being far from perfect) has done a good job so far in weathering all storms that have come its way (remember that time Obama was linked to a certain radical pastor? who talks about that anymore?) and come out of everything pretty much on top. I am sure that the next week's narrative will have something to do with the outright dishonest and dishonorable nature of a lot of the ads that the McCain campaign is running (that sex-ed one comes to mind) and the flaws in the Palin selection (which after some initial doubts has been hailed as a great success from what I have read)."
There you have it, ladies and gents, the media is so predictable that this lowly college advisor could figure out what would play out in the coming week: a shift in narrative, new portents of an Obama surge, and Palin coming under even more scrutiny.
As for another prediction, I don't think I want to press my luck... BUT I do like to gamble, so I am going to go out on a limb:
Prediction: Next week will be another rough one for McCain, as his "fundamentals" comment gets more and more play, and possibly his bizarre interview coupled with Chuck Hagel's comments about Palin will play well into the developing narrative that McCain's numbers are following the Dow's southward plunge. Look for this to feed nicely into the story that McCain will "do better than expected" in next Friday's debate.
Lets watch how this works.
26 August 2008
first day
My first day at school was yesterday, and it was dominated by a singular, week-defining event:
The EYE BUG CATASTROPHE!!!!111
The story goes as follows:
It was around 9:48 or so (it was a very lax day, the kids had no use for college guidance on a day when they were learning where all of their classes were), when I started to rub my right eye. Typically, this process is known as 'rubbing the sleep out of ones eyes’, which at this boring and relatively early juncture of the day was exactly my plan. Typically this part of the eye is full of goodies, you know eye crust and the like. As I rubbed, though, I noted that my particular treasure this time was a lot bigger in mass and queer in texture as compared to the standard issue I typically get. As I rolled this treat down my cheek and collected it on my finger, I noticed something… horrific. Something so shocking that I am pretty sure I jumped out of my seat and shrieked.
What was this ghastly discovery?
Nothing other than a GREEN BUG. Yes, there on the tip of my finger was green insect of about 3 mm in length and .75 mm in width. The presence of this bug was disturbing in the extreme. After all, its probably one of the things you least expect to see staring right back at you when you rub your eye. Needless to say, this discovery prompted more questions than it did answers, questions such as:
1) Where the hell did this bug come from? (and sub-questions like)
1a) How did it get in my eye?
1b) Did it originate in my eye or merely land there from above or crawl there from below?
1c)Has this bug been in my eye since Saturday, when I thought I got a flying object in my eye for a bit?
2) Why do things like this happen to me?
These questions raced in my head all day, preventing me from doing my normal duties at work (of which there were very few, but still it was a considerable distraction).
For the rest of the day, I was phased by the presence of the bug, and I spent due time and diligence doing my best to measure, categorize, and analyze the bug in full detail.
All that I can provide to you, dear reader, is this somewhat blurry iPhone generated photograph of the culprit.
If you have any information that could lead to this bug’s identification or an explanation of what it was doing in my eye, please send all responses to:
wtf!?@lolerskates.edu
The EYE BUG CATASTROPHE!!!!111
The story goes as follows:
It was around 9:48 or so (it was a very lax day, the kids had no use for college guidance on a day when they were learning where all of their classes were), when I started to rub my right eye. Typically, this process is known as 'rubbing the sleep out of ones eyes’, which at this boring and relatively early juncture of the day was exactly my plan. Typically this part of the eye is full of goodies, you know eye crust and the like. As I rubbed, though, I noted that my particular treasure this time was a lot bigger in mass and queer in texture as compared to the standard issue I typically get. As I rolled this treat down my cheek and collected it on my finger, I noticed something… horrific. Something so shocking that I am pretty sure I jumped out of my seat and shrieked.
What was this ghastly discovery?
Nothing other than a GREEN BUG. Yes, there on the tip of my finger was green insect of about 3 mm in length and .75 mm in width. The presence of this bug was disturbing in the extreme. After all, its probably one of the things you least expect to see staring right back at you when you rub your eye. Needless to say, this discovery prompted more questions than it did answers, questions such as:
1) Where the hell did this bug come from? (and sub-questions like)
1a) How did it get in my eye?
1b) Did it originate in my eye or merely land there from above or crawl there from below?
1c)Has this bug been in my eye since Saturday, when I thought I got a flying object in my eye for a bit?
2) Why do things like this happen to me?
These questions raced in my head all day, preventing me from doing my normal duties at work (of which there were very few, but still it was a considerable distraction).
For the rest of the day, I was phased by the presence of the bug, and I spent due time and diligence doing my best to measure, categorize, and analyze the bug in full detail.
All that I can provide to you, dear reader, is this somewhat blurry iPhone generated photograph of the culprit.
If you have any information that could lead to this bug’s identification or an explanation of what it was doing in my eye, please send all responses to:
wtf!?@lolerskates.edu
15 August 2008
antenna debacle
Fact: I really enjoy the Olympics, especially the summer games and I will do most anything to watch them. Up to an including driving 2 and a half hours to go to a friendly home that features cable TV to see the games and get a home cooked meal.
Fact: I am intensely poor right now. Americorps doesn’t exactly shell out the big bucks… and the market for a side job isn’t looking so hot right now (check back for future posts on that can of worms), thus I am constantly looking for ways to get by on the cheap.
Considering these two facts, and how they press upon my conscience at all hours of the day this time of the Olympiad, the following tale must be amusing in the utmost for you, dear reader, and the universe on the whole.
At some point on Monday I decided that I had enough. I couldn’t take any more hearing about Michael Phelps’ amazing performances over the phone, couldn’t take missing out on all of the gymnastics and reading about it the next day. No, I was going to do something about it. I was going to “Be Proactive” (Habit 1 for those Steve Covey fans out there) and fix my situation… economically. Because I wanted merely a glimpse at the prime time Olympic events (none of that handball or rhythmic gymnastics bullshit they relegate to daytime CNBC ) and do so cheaply, the way to go would be to get the most basic of cable packages. Determined to get this cable as soon as possible, I charged across the street to the Comcast office during my lunch break and demanded a breakdown of their packages. Much to my chagrin, their most basic package consisted of only the first 20 channels and cost a little over TWENTY BUCKS a month. Not going to happen, I thought. It was time for Plan B: RABBIT EARS to nab the FREE NBC floating around the airwaves. Heck, I thought, if I buy the right kind, I might be able to pick up broadcast HD… for a second I thought I was going to be money in the bank (if not literally, figuratively perhaps).
Everything was turning up Brendan at Wal-Mart, especially when I discovered that not only were the rabbit ears five dollars cheaper than advertised online, but that they were HD compatible in a big way. SILLY, I thought to myself, I am going to be checking out that synchronized diving in HD in no time. I was cised until I walked up to the register, when I was served my first cruel dose of cruel reality.
Things first seemed too good to be true when I stepped up to purchase my device. I was being rung up by a ONE TOOTHED (I wish I were kidding, but this is FroRo after all) cashier named Betsy (again, if you are thinking that this is too stereotypically Wal-Mart, I will take you to her myself).
// My inner monolgue just before making purchase //
“I am such a fucking peasant grundoon right now,” my higher conscience told me. “There is no way you are going to get what you want out of this, there is a reason that Comcast sells ultra-basic cable for plebeian assholes like yourself.”
“Shut up, cheap TV, dreamy Michael Phelps,” my lower order brain replied.
// and that was that //
The purchase made, and Betsy’s visage burned in my mind’s eye, I raced home to give my TV the gift of life.
Cue Cruel Dose Of Reality #2.
Antennas are a bitch to set up. Each channel has its own frequency that demands a certain positioning from the rabbit ears and a setting on the knob that masters the set. Not only that, newer TVs (like those made before the stone age) expect to get some input that is better than 1950’s style technology, which makes optimizing the output from an antenna difficult. I didn’t know this until I spent an hour and a half trying to get the damned set to work.
Call this CDOR #3:
After hour number 2 of fussing with the primitive device (the last half hour spent looking up possible solutions on the iPhone, my lone connection to the outside world) I came to a singular and very disappointing realization: the reason that Comcast offers an ultra-basic, just the broadcast channels service in FroRo is that the signals from D.C. DO NOT REACH THIS FUCKING PLACE! Nestled comfortably in the Shenandoah Valley, the town is impervious to signals from surrounding cities… bully!
I let the immense disappointment set in for a second, gathered my wits, and decided to put the whole thing on ice until I could figure out what the hell I was going to do to get cheap TV.
More on the Great Satellite Con later…
Fact: I am intensely poor right now. Americorps doesn’t exactly shell out the big bucks… and the market for a side job isn’t looking so hot right now (check back for future posts on that can of worms), thus I am constantly looking for ways to get by on the cheap.
Considering these two facts, and how they press upon my conscience at all hours of the day this time of the Olympiad, the following tale must be amusing in the utmost for you, dear reader, and the universe on the whole.
At some point on Monday I decided that I had enough. I couldn’t take any more hearing about Michael Phelps’ amazing performances over the phone, couldn’t take missing out on all of the gymnastics and reading about it the next day. No, I was going to do something about it. I was going to “Be Proactive” (Habit 1 for those Steve Covey fans out there) and fix my situation… economically. Because I wanted merely a glimpse at the prime time Olympic events (none of that handball or rhythmic gymnastics bullshit they relegate to daytime CNBC ) and do so cheaply, the way to go would be to get the most basic of cable packages. Determined to get this cable as soon as possible, I charged across the street to the Comcast office during my lunch break and demanded a breakdown of their packages. Much to my chagrin, their most basic package consisted of only the first 20 channels and cost a little over TWENTY BUCKS a month. Not going to happen, I thought. It was time for Plan B: RABBIT EARS to nab the FREE NBC floating around the airwaves. Heck, I thought, if I buy the right kind, I might be able to pick up broadcast HD… for a second I thought I was going to be money in the bank (if not literally, figuratively perhaps).
Everything was turning up Brendan at Wal-Mart, especially when I discovered that not only were the rabbit ears five dollars cheaper than advertised online, but that they were HD compatible in a big way. SILLY, I thought to myself, I am going to be checking out that synchronized diving in HD in no time. I was cised until I walked up to the register, when I was served my first cruel dose of cruel reality.
Things first seemed too good to be true when I stepped up to purchase my device. I was being rung up by a ONE TOOTHED (I wish I were kidding, but this is FroRo after all) cashier named Betsy (again, if you are thinking that this is too stereotypically Wal-Mart, I will take you to her myself).
// My inner monolgue just before making purchase //
“I am such a fucking peasant grundoon right now,” my higher conscience told me. “There is no way you are going to get what you want out of this, there is a reason that Comcast sells ultra-basic cable for plebeian assholes like yourself.”
“Shut up, cheap TV, dreamy Michael Phelps,” my lower order brain replied.
// and that was that //
The purchase made, and Betsy’s visage burned in my mind’s eye, I raced home to give my TV the gift of life.
Cue Cruel Dose Of Reality #2.
Antennas are a bitch to set up. Each channel has its own frequency that demands a certain positioning from the rabbit ears and a setting on the knob that masters the set. Not only that, newer TVs (like those made before the stone age) expect to get some input that is better than 1950’s style technology, which makes optimizing the output from an antenna difficult. I didn’t know this until I spent an hour and a half trying to get the damned set to work.
Call this CDOR #3:
After hour number 2 of fussing with the primitive device (the last half hour spent looking up possible solutions on the iPhone, my lone connection to the outside world) I came to a singular and very disappointing realization: the reason that Comcast offers an ultra-basic, just the broadcast channels service in FroRo is that the signals from D.C. DO NOT REACH THIS FUCKING PLACE! Nestled comfortably in the Shenandoah Valley, the town is impervious to signals from surrounding cities… bully!
I let the immense disappointment set in for a second, gathered my wits, and decided to put the whole thing on ice until I could figure out what the hell I was going to do to get cheap TV.
More on the Great Satellite Con later…
13 August 2008
soul mountain
Soul is a word that is thrown around quite freely these days. One can listen to a local KISS FM and hear very “soul”-ful music. One can go to the local barber shop and get a treatment of Soul Glo for their do. One can even hop on board the Soul Train if one is lucky enough to catch a rerun. The creation of any number of soul-related products and concepts cheapens the meaning of a potentially powerful word. After all, the soul is the metaphysical essence that all humans supposedly possess. That’s some important, weighty stuff. Clearly not meant to be bandied about to describe just any run of the mill person, place, or thing.
Upon my move-in to FroRo, though, I believe I reached the pinnacle of dining experiences in a place that is well deserving of its moniker. I scaled the face of Soul Mountain.
Soul Mountain is a black enterprise in the heart of downtown FroRo, specializing in Caribbean fusion cuisine presented in a culturally rich atmosphere. Its menu features a wide variety of spiced poultry and seafood, with an equally impressive drink list composed of both locally grown wines and fine international beers. The walls of the restaurant are festooned with various cultural items from far flung corners of the world: ancestral masks from west Africa, a large Persian tapestry, and a rotund ivory Buddha to name a few of the items. Unique not only in menu and décor, the restaurant also features entertainment programming that makes it even more attractive dining location. Colorful fliers on its chalkboard make it clear that each day has something unique to offer denizens of Soul Mountain: open mike on Wednesdays, Las Vegas lounge-style entertainment on Saturday nights, and dance music Thursday and Friday.
But no great restaurant can truly stand out without service to match. Soul Mountain does not disappoint in this aspect either. Ashad and I were treated to bottomless glasses of the most delicious, thirst quenching pink lemonade we had ever experienced. Our respective entrees were not only delicious in of themselves, but the speed and courtesy with which they were delivered made them even more savory – if that were somehow possible. Now, one may expect such a royal feast to come at an equally princely sum, but nothing could be further from the truth. Our meals came to a grand total of six dollars apiece thanks to a generous lunch special that capped off the entire dining experience nicely.
All of the facts considered, I hope to become a regular there. And I wouldn’t mind at all – nor would I be surprised in the least – if heaven turned out to be located upon the frosty peaks of Soul Mountain.
Upon my move-in to FroRo, though, I believe I reached the pinnacle of dining experiences in a place that is well deserving of its moniker. I scaled the face of Soul Mountain.
Soul Mountain is a black enterprise in the heart of downtown FroRo, specializing in Caribbean fusion cuisine presented in a culturally rich atmosphere. Its menu features a wide variety of spiced poultry and seafood, with an equally impressive drink list composed of both locally grown wines and fine international beers. The walls of the restaurant are festooned with various cultural items from far flung corners of the world: ancestral masks from west Africa, a large Persian tapestry, and a rotund ivory Buddha to name a few of the items. Unique not only in menu and décor, the restaurant also features entertainment programming that makes it even more attractive dining location. Colorful fliers on its chalkboard make it clear that each day has something unique to offer denizens of Soul Mountain: open mike on Wednesdays, Las Vegas lounge-style entertainment on Saturday nights, and dance music Thursday and Friday.
But no great restaurant can truly stand out without service to match. Soul Mountain does not disappoint in this aspect either. Ashad and I were treated to bottomless glasses of the most delicious, thirst quenching pink lemonade we had ever experienced. Our respective entrees were not only delicious in of themselves, but the speed and courtesy with which they were delivered made them even more savory – if that were somehow possible. Now, one may expect such a royal feast to come at an equally princely sum, but nothing could be further from the truth. Our meals came to a grand total of six dollars apiece thanks to a generous lunch special that capped off the entire dining experience nicely.
All of the facts considered, I hope to become a regular there. And I wouldn’t mind at all – nor would I be surprised in the least – if heaven turned out to be located upon the frosty peaks of Soul Mountain.
02 August 2008
becky hammon
- the obligatory explanation for a lack of recent activity -
There is really no good explanation, other than the fact that I have had a rather fluid schedule, with no time set aside for noting down what I have been doing or thinking. Now that I find myself settling down into a good rhythm of things, should be able to keep up better with the blog.
- and now, on to the content -
As I read the latest edition of Sports Illustrated, I came upon an article about soon to be naturalized Russian (naturally born American) "Big Shot" Becky Hammon, a guard for the San Antonio Silver Stars and CSKA Moscow. Her story is not too complicated: she was not selected to the US National team, and took full advantage of a clause in her CSKA Moscow contract that provided a six-figure incentive if she were to play for the Russian national team and medal in the Olympics.
She is of the mind, as per her quotes in the article, that she is merely fulfilling a life-long dream of playing in the Olympic Games. Hammon rejects the "mercenary" label she has been given by some critics who cite the traitorous nature of playing for a country that for the greater part of the past century was the United States' sporting (and Cold War, for that matter) arch-enemy. The 2007 MVP runner-up "wish[es she were] given the opportunity to turn down two million dollars, to play for [her] country, because [she] would've done it in a second."
Given the opportunity to turn down money, to play for your country? I'm sorry, but this is not a matter of opporunity. This is a matter of a professional athlete looking to make more money and using the Olympic Games, a once amateur-oreinted competition founded upon the principle world peace and understanding through international sporting competition. Hammon (and her turncoat compatriot J.R. Holden) along with their enablers CSKA Moskow and the Russian government/sporting autorities. I have no problem with professional athletes doing what htey need to do to get the money they are able to earn due to their God-given natural ability and honed talent. But to cite the chance to seize upon the unique opportunity of playing in the Olympics as a reason for playing for a different national team is dishonest at best and ruinous to international competition. Hammon is merely seizing upon a unique opportunity for her wallet.
National teams are supposed to be the best of the best from the country they represent. They are not meant to be yet another club team for which any player can suit up. If they are, such hallowed competitions as the Olympics and the FIFA World Cup cease to have any special meaning and become second-rate tournaments to top level club competitions like the UEFA Champions League. International sporting bodies like FIFA and FIBA should clamp down on rules that allow players to be mercenaries and punish clubs like CSKA Moskow that tempt players to switch national allegiance through financial incentives.
And as for Ms. Hammon, I hope she and her Russian "countrywomen" come in a close second to the United States at the Games and that the playing of The Star Spangled Banner arouses in her the deepest of disappointments, too deep for any sum of money to fill.
There is really no good explanation, other than the fact that I have had a rather fluid schedule, with no time set aside for noting down what I have been doing or thinking. Now that I find myself settling down into a good rhythm of things, should be able to keep up better with the blog.
- and now, on to the content -
As I read the latest edition of Sports Illustrated, I came upon an article about soon to be naturalized Russian (naturally born American) "Big Shot" Becky Hammon, a guard for the San Antonio Silver Stars and CSKA Moscow. Her story is not too complicated: she was not selected to the US National team, and took full advantage of a clause in her CSKA Moscow contract that provided a six-figure incentive if she were to play for the Russian national team and medal in the Olympics.
She is of the mind, as per her quotes in the article, that she is merely fulfilling a life-long dream of playing in the Olympic Games. Hammon rejects the "mercenary" label she has been given by some critics who cite the traitorous nature of playing for a country that for the greater part of the past century was the United States' sporting (and Cold War, for that matter) arch-enemy. The 2007 MVP runner-up "wish[es she were] given the opportunity to turn down two million dollars, to play for [her] country, because [she] would've done it in a second."
Given the opportunity to turn down money, to play for your country? I'm sorry, but this is not a matter of opporunity. This is a matter of a professional athlete looking to make more money and using the Olympic Games, a once amateur-oreinted competition founded upon the principle world peace and understanding through international sporting competition. Hammon (and her turncoat compatriot J.R. Holden) along with their enablers CSKA Moskow and the Russian government/sporting autorities. I have no problem with professional athletes doing what htey need to do to get the money they are able to earn due to their God-given natural ability and honed talent. But to cite the chance to seize upon the unique opportunity of playing in the Olympics as a reason for playing for a different national team is dishonest at best and ruinous to international competition. Hammon is merely seizing upon a unique opportunity for her wallet.
National teams are supposed to be the best of the best from the country they represent. They are not meant to be yet another club team for which any player can suit up. If they are, such hallowed competitions as the Olympics and the FIFA World Cup cease to have any special meaning and become second-rate tournaments to top level club competitions like the UEFA Champions League. International sporting bodies like FIFA and FIBA should clamp down on rules that allow players to be mercenaries and punish clubs like CSKA Moskow that tempt players to switch national allegiance through financial incentives.
And as for Ms. Hammon, I hope she and her Russian "countrywomen" come in a close second to the United States at the Games and that the playing of The Star Spangled Banner arouses in her the deepest of disappointments, too deep for any sum of money to fill.
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